Alex's Mission and Addison's Secret
by Darling Pretty
Summary: The Chief sends Alex on a simple mission to LA. Just check on Addison. The fact that Callie was involved makes him nervous. And rightly so, since Callie knows Addison's secret. Addison/Alex. Oneshot


**For Gigi, because I promised. Even though this is definitely more dairy than coffee. (Yeah, don't worry, I'm not sure that I fully get that metaphor either.)**

* * *

Alex looks nervously at the door to Oceanside Wellness Center. Not that he's afraid of the building, because that would be stupid. And he's not afraid of the woman inside of said building either. Okay, maybe he's a_ little_ afraid of the woman inside. But he's not _just _afraid of the woman inside. He respects her professionally and as a person, and he may be more than a little in love with her—although he'd never admit it—and he's convinced that he's not good enough for her.

He's not here because he's going to tell her that. He's here because the Chief had ordered him on the weirdest possible mission. Go down to LA and check up on Addison. Why had he accepted? Because the Chief asked and what the Chief wants, the Chief gets. Besides, he's getting paid to go to LA. Not exactly a bad deal. He doesn't know why the Chief chose him, only that Callie had been consulted and that worries him.

Plucking up his courage, he shoves his way through the building's doors and gets on the elevator. The door opens to the warm, airy office. It's calm. _This _is where _the _Addison Montgomery works? It looks like he imagines she would decorate, but there's no chaos. No panic. It doesn't make sense.

He looks over to the reception desk. He would know that head of hair anywhere. He walks over and clears his throat, a little uncertain. She either doesn't hear, doesn't know the throat clearing is for her or is resolutely ignoring him. He tries again. "Dr. Montgomery?" he says quietly.

She whips around, her eyes wide. "Karev?" she whispers.

He doesn't respond. He's too busy staring at her seven month pregnant stomach.

She opens her mouth to try to explain. "Um, hi," is what comes out.

"Y-you're pregnant?" he stutters.

'What are you doing here?" she asks.

"You're pregnant?' he repeats.

"Yes. What are you doing here?" Her hand rests protectively on her stomach.

"Since when?" he asks bluntly, trying not to think about the fact that she had been in Seattle up until five months ago.

She rewards him with a wry smile, glad to be back on solid ground. "Oh, come on, Karev, I taught you better that that," she teases. "If you can't tell that I'm somewhere around seven months, I'm going to have to beat you about the head. I know you didn't like my service, but it wasn't that long ago. If you've already forgotten, I may have to come back to Seattle just to torment you some more."

"Is it mine?"

Her smile drops off her face. "Not now," she says after an initial hesitation.

"Addison, I have a right to know!"

"It's Dr. Montgomery." Her voice turns to ice.

"I'm going to take that as a yes unless you contradict me in the next three seconds."

She studies the floor.

"Dude, seriously?!"

She studies the floor some more.

"What the hell is your problem, Addison?"

"Dr. Montgomery!" she practically screams.

"The fact that you're having my baby and you didn't tell me gives me the right to call you whatever the hell I want, _Addison_!"

At this point everybody in the lobby knows that Addison is having Alex's kid. She flushes bright red. "Come on," she hisses unhappily, dragging him into her office. He closes the door behind them and turns to face her. She slaps him hard across the face. "How _dare _you?" she snaps. "I _work _here, Karev. I have to face these people every day and you come screaming that I'm having your child. What the hell are you even doing here?"

"The Chief sent me," he says, nursing his now red cheek. "That _hurt_, by the way."

"Good," she replies. Then she starts mumbling to herself, "I am going to kill that man. He is so dead."

"Any particular reason you're plotting the Chief's demise?"

She jumps as if she had forgotten that he was even there. "Oh, I, um…"she stammers.

"Addison," he says gently.

"I…"

"It's okay," he prods carefully.

"I told him that I'm pregnant a couple of weeks ago. He's not exactly happy with me right now."

"Oh."

"I still don't know what you're doing here," she says carefully.

"The Chief wanted someone to check up you. He asked Callie who to send."

"Of course!" Addison exclaims. "This is exactly something she would do."

"Can we stop talking about the Chief and Callie?"

"Fine, Karev," she sighs. "What do _you _want to talk about?" She rubs her temples, suddenly exhausted.

"We can start with the fact that you're having my kid," he says.

"What about it?"

"Were you ever going to tell me?"

Addison stares at the floor.

"What the hell, Addison? I have the right to know that I'm going to be a father! What were you thinking?"

She's been good about letting him rant, but now she snaps. "I was thinking that you never wanted to see me again! I was thinking that you're not interested! I was thinking that _I'm not your girlfriend_!"

He hates her for throwing his words back in his face. "What the hell did you want me to say, Addison? You were looking at me like I was some kind of superhero, like I was going to save you. I can't do that. I don't do things like that. I'm not that guy."

"Save me?" she laughs bitterly. "You think I wanted you to _save _me? Alex, all I wanted was someone to make me laugh. Someone to have a good time with. That's all. I don't need a Messiah. I don't need you either. I'm not going to keep your kid from you now, Alex. But I'm not expecting anything from you either." She walks to the door.

"Addison-" He tries to say something and fails miserably.

She turns around. "I just wanted to be treated like I meant something to someone," she shrugs. "And, for the record, even if I had been asking for more, I wouldn't have been asking you for anything that you aren't capable of."

Before he can answer, she leaves, instructing him to close the door on his way out.

0ooo0

It takes him a good half an hour to get out of her office, and her coworkers definitely give him some weird looks on his way out. But he deserves a little bit of a break; he just found out that he's going to be a father. He had to do some thinking.

He's in a weird spot. A really weird spot, He doesn't do commitment. He can't be anything that Addison is looking for—anything she needs. He's not able to be that baseball and barbeque kind of person, for lack of a better term. It doesn't matter than he feels more for her than he's ever felt for anybody else. Just because the woman is the love of his life doesn't make him capable of being what she needs.

On the other hand, he will _not _be his father. He wants to be there for that kid. Birthdays, holidays, the works. He wants to prove to everyone—his mom, his dad, Addison—that he can do something right. He is not going to be the bastard who abandons his child. He wants to be there for Addison; he wants to be the baseball and barbeque sort of guy. He wants a family. He wants her.

So finally he calls Callie, which just shows you how desperate he is. Callie had given him her number for emergencies only (which definitely means that she knew what was going on, because she never would have given it to him had she not), and he figures that this qualifies as an emergency. She gives up Addison's address easily. He gets off the phone as soon as possible and catches a cab to her house.

It doesn't take her very long to open the door. "Okay, look," he says the moment he sees her. "We need to talk."

She stares at him and finally steps aside.

He studies her face as they enter the house. "Are you crying?" he asks as he notices her red and swollen eyes.

"I'm hormonal and I was just watching _Titanic_," she explains quickly. He doesn't believe her and glances at her television.

"You're watching _Bewitched_," he points out.

"I changed the channel."

"Addison," he says. "We need to talk."

"What's there to talk about?"

"I'm not… I don't…" he struggles to find a way to start.

"Alex, we don't have to talk about this. I don't want anything from you. I don't expect you to be in our life. I'll be fine on my own. You don't need to feel obligated."

"I want to be there, okay?" he finally snaps. "I want to be there for the baby and I want to be there for you!"

"Don't say that," she orders. "Don't pretend you want me."

"I'm not pretending!"

"I don't believe you!"

"Addison, I've wanted you since Sloan showed up in Seattle. I've _always _wanted you."

"You have a funny way of showing it," she scoffs.

"You scare me, okay?"

"Wow, way to compliment a girl," she retorts, sarcasm dripping out of every syllable.

"I didn't mean it like that. But I've never done this before. I've never been able to see myself with somebody for more than a month or two. But not you."

"You want Ava," she croaks.

"You want me to want Ava. You want me to want anybody but you."

"Exactly!" she cries. "I can't do this thing with you anymore, Alex! I can't take any more mind games. You acted like you wanted me and then totally took everything back! I can't take that anymore. I need someone who loves me all the time, not only some of it."

He wants to say that he could be that someone, but he doesn't. Addison starts crying again. "What do you want me to do?" he asks quietly, stepping closer to her. He wants to hold her but subconsciously senses that's not a good idea.

"I want… I want… I don't know what I want!"

"Do you want me to be… in the baby's life, or whatever?"

"Yes," she whispers hesitantly. "Do you want to be?"

"If you want me to be."

"I do."

"You should have told me," he berates her.

She looks at the floor, refusing to meet his eyes. "I was scared."

"Have you decided on a name for…?" he asks instead of continuing down that line of thinking. That line of thinking is going to make him feel like the biggest jackass in the world.

"Her," Addison whispers. She still won't meet his eyes and a blush starts to color her cheeks. "Alexandra."

He stares at her. "What?"

"I like the name," she snaps defensively.

He nods, entering shock again.

She tucks a strand of hair behind her ear nervously. "If, uh, if you don't like the name, I'm, uh, open to suggestions."

"No, I… it's good."

"Okay," she says with a tentative smile.

He smiles back and it seems like things might be less complicated than either of them think.

0ooo0

Addison nearly screams in frustration when the doorbell rings at the exact moment that she realizes Allie has managed to figure out the Velcro on her shoes. She figures that Allie can live a couple of seconds without her shoes and rushes to the door.

"Hey," Alex greets her, stepping into the doorway to hug her.

"You're here," Addison sighs in relief. "I was starting to think that your flight was delayed or something. Allie, look who it is!"

Allie looks over and claps happily when she sees her father. "Dada!"

"Thank you _so _much for agreeing to take her for the morning," Addison says. "I have so much left to do before her party and I don't know how I'd get it all done."

"Do you need help?"

"No, I'm good. Just have fun with Allie and be careful."

"You look tired," he accuses her.

"I _am _tired," she retorts.

"You sure there's nothing I can do?"

"See, now why couldn't you have been like this when you were working for me?" she asks.

"Where would the fun have been in that?" he replies.

She rolls her eyes. "Get out of here. I still have cake to bake and presents to wrap."

"You're baking?" he inquires skeptically. "Do you _want _them to hate you?"

She swats his arm with a laugh. "You're a jerk. Now shut up and take the kid, will you?"

He bends down, scoops up Allie, and kisses Addison's cheek. "We'll see you later. Say bye to your mom, Allie."

"Buh-bye!"

0ooo0

Addison collapses onto the couch next to Alex. She has finally managed to get Allie to fall asleep—always an hour long process, since Allie refuses to fall asleep without an off-key rendition of "Golden Slumbers" by the Beatles—and she's exhausted. "Thanks again for flying in," she says.

"You think I'd miss her birthday? Her first birthday? Seriously?"

"No. I don't. But it still means a lot to me."

"She's my daughter too, Addison."

"I know that. You think I don't know that? I figured that one out when her first word was no."

"Hey!"

"You know it's true," Addison says with a smile.

They sit in a comfortable silence until Alex breaks it. "So I was thinking-"

Addison groans and cuts him off. "If this is about you moving to LA, I suggest you stop talking."

"Why won't you even talk about it?" he asks.

"Because," Addison says simply, "I don't want to."

"Why not?"

"Because we'll end up having the exact same argument. You'll say you want to be closer to Allie. I'll say that I'm not letting you give up a spot at one of the most prestigious teaching hospitals in the country. You'll say that she's your daughter. I'll say that I know that, and I'm still not letting you do that to your career. You'll get angry, but you won't say that you are. And then we'll end up not talking until Allie wakes up. End of story. Today has been good and I don't want to ruin it by fighting with you."

The look she gives him says that the matter is closed. He gets the memo and changes the subject. "Today _was _good," he agrees.

"Even the cake? Nobody turned into a mutant or anything?"

"Even the cake," he concedes with a laugh.

His arm is draped loosely around the back of the couch. If she wanted to, she could lean in and lay her head down on his shoulder. Heaving a sigh, she does exactly that. In a very friendly manned. Well, they do have a kid together, so they can be friends since they're not lovers. "You're tired," he accuses her.

"We established that this morning," she replies.

"You know, if I moved down here-"

Once again, she cuts him off, sitting up and looking offended. "Alex, how many times do I have to say it? You are not derailing your career for us!"

"Don't be stupid, Addison."

"Seattle Grace is one of the best hospitals in the country. You worked hard to get your spot. And you're not giving that up because I'm living in LA. If you really want to see Allie all that much…" She trails off.

"What?" he asks when she doesn't finish her sentence.

Addison takes a deep breath. "Then we'll move to Seattle."

Alex laughs again. "Don't be stupid."

"I'm serious!"

"No, you're not."

"Yes, I am! It wouldn't be difficult for us. Richard would give me my job back in a second and you know it."

"You were _miserable _in Seattle," he points out.

She picks at a thread in the couch. "Not all the time," she says quietly.

"I wouldn't ask you to do that," he replies.

There's more silence. Addison starts to get up. "It's not just about Allie, you know," he says.

She turns to look at him. "What?"

"Me moving. It's not just about Allie. It's about you."

"Don't," she says quickly.

"I mean it."

"Alex," she pleads. Already she can feel tears starting to burn the back of her eyes. Just because she's fantasized about these words doesn't mean that she's ready to hear them. "We have a good thing going right now. Don't."

"Addison, I've been trying to do this for the past year, so just let me, okay?"

"No, I… I can't. I just can't." She gets up and runs outside onto her back deck.

He waits a second before chasing after her. "What's that all about?" he asks, crossing to her.

She turns to him, trying to hide the fact that she's crying. "Nothing."

"Addison," he says, pulling her close to him. "Tell me what's wrong."

She fights a losing battle to keep her reasons to herself. "I want to, Alex, I do, but the second I do…"

"What?"

"The second I let you in, you're going to leave," she whispers. It breaks his heart.

He clenches his fists, beating himself up for ever treating the mother of his child like that. "Addison, that was a long time ago."

"Not really," she says. "Only two years."

"But… the second I found out you were pregnant, I stepped up, didn't I?"

She wipes away tears. "I guess. Yeah."

"And have I ever missed anything you wanted me to be there for?"

"No."

"I won't run, Addison. Not this time."

"I want to believe you, but-"

He cuts her off with a soft kiss.

"Alex, how is this supposed to work?" she says, pulling away.

"Remember how we were just arguing about whether or not I would move down here."

"You're not moving down here!" Addison insists.

"I'm not asking you to move to Seattle either."

"See? How is this supposed to work?" she says.

He kisses her again. "Just try, okay? We can figure everything out later."

Against her better judgment, she nods slightly. It probably has something to do with the fact that her head is all foggy from the multiple kisses. "You're just lucky I'm so tired," she informs him. "I would never give in this easily normally."

He laughs. "I know. Believe me, I know."

* * *

**Well, hope you enjoyed. :)**

**-Juli-**


End file.
